Dr. Kenney’s Friday 5 Spot
On Fridays I like to share experiences I’ve had during the week with patients and in my personal life that I’ve found significant. I share these in the hope that you might find value in them and have something that resonates with you in your life.
An analogy I like. As humans, it is inevitable that we will have to face challenges in our relationships, finances, health, jobs, and more. Depending on the severity, these times can feel dark, so I like to envision them as if being lost in the woods. The important thing to understand is that no one is coming to save you. Thus, the worst thing you can do is stand still and do nothing. You’ll make no progress, and things will only become bleaker. It is crucial to get up and start moving in a direction. Doing so will either allow you to find your own way or place you in a position where you encounter others that can assist you.
In life, we cannot expect things to go right for us without any effort. Likewise, we are not going to be able to solve every issue without help. Therefore, the best approach is like being lost in the woods. We must begin heading in a direction even if we don’t know exactly where we are. I have found that taking the step to pursue even basic action usually begins opening more opportunities for us to encounter people and answers that can help us. It does not matter what aspect of life it pertains to, get yourself moving so that the right doors can begin to open for you.
A concept I believe in. My assistant coach in football is a dentist and would always say that our offense was like Novocain, “give it time, it always works.” His point was that we needed to remain patient, keep doing our thing, and it would eventually start going our way. This always made me laugh because he was 100% correct. I found that saying to be true of football, but even more applicable to life.
Few things will not eventually go your way if you simply stay with it. Most people encounter challenges, become discouraged, and simply stop trying. Instead of doing that, if you remained consistent and kept showing up and putting forth your best effort each time, you would encounter a different result. Much can be gained in life through repetition, trial, and error, and then applying the knowledge you have attained. However, this never occurs if we give up. Therefore, treat your biggest and most cherished goals like Novocain, give them time and they will work.
Something I notice. My wife and I have watched many shows over the years where a restaurant is in trouble and a renowned chef/restauranteur will come in to assist them. Usually there are issues with the processes, the food, cleanliness, and more. Without fail, the toughest fixes are always among those that feel they know everything. In these instances, despite being in a crisis, in serious debt, and nearly out of business, the owners are still reluctant to accept advice. Conversely, the easiest corrections seem to be among those that are failing in business yet humble enough to take guidance from those with experience. This is how things work often in life too.
None of us know everything. When we pretend or think we do, and are unwilling to change our ways, bad things tend to happen. This can entail anything from chronic stress, destruction of relationships, or downfalls in business/career. On the other hand, when we make the basic decision to admit that we could do better and are willing to accept help, amazing things can happen. There is no shame in seeking the assistance of those with more experience that have a desire to help us. Personally, I love learning from people I respect to help myself improve as a businessman, chiropractor, father, husband, coach, and anything else I care about. Whether you are in a great position or a challenging one, always be humble enough to accept that you may not know everything and there may still be ways to improve. This does not make you weak, it makes you smart.
A recent interaction. There is a guy I have known for years that has an amazing resume on paper. He is also part of an organization that I am involved with, and recently I was asked for my opinion of him. Though I am not the type to badmouth anyone, I am brutally honest when asked for a true assessment of someone or something. Therefore, I told this person, “That guy is a fugazi (street slang for fake).” This surprised the other party, and they asked why I felt that way. I explained that I’d witnessed him being disrespectful to women, not paying people for services rendered, being in situations where everyone worked hard and he stood around doing nothing, and that he seemed to always kiss up to people above him. In other words, he works hard to maintain a persona, but it doesn’t match the actions I’ve seen repeatedly. This is an important and cautionary lesson.
You are constantly observed and assessed by those around you. This is not a reason to be paranoid but is a reminder to remain genuine and honest. If people hear you speak or promote yourself in one manner, and what they observe behind the scenes doesn’t match that, you will not be trusted. Conversely, when your behavior synchronizes in this fashion, you will attain the trust and faith of those that see this in a profound way. We all make mistakes and certainly no one is perfect. However, those that are consistent in their actions, principles, and interactions tend to be those that we entrust the most. This is crucial in how we evaluate those around us, and to remember for our own behavior.
Some quotes I Love.
“Stop being afraid of what can go wrong. Start being excited about what can go right.”
“One of life’s strangest contradictions: The busiest people always find time, while the lazy are always busy. It’s an absolute truth that if you want to get something done, ask a busy person.” – Patrick Bet-David
“A mistake that makes you humble is better than an achievement that makes you arrogant.”