Dr. Kenney’s Friday 5 Spot
On Fridays I like to share some of the experiences I’ve had during the week with patients and in my personal life that I’ve found significant in some way. I like to share them in hopes that you might find value in them and have something resonate with you in your life.
A technique I often use. Have you ever gone out with friends and eaten a ton of food or had a bunch of drinks you know you really shouldn’t? Ever skipped a morning workout to sleep in? Have you given in to your anger and completely lost it on someone when you knew it was a bad idea? These are all examples of letting our emotions grow in the moment and making a choice we’ll later regret. It happens to all of us.
One of the techniques I like to use in situations like this, is to avoid focusing on how I’d feel doing something in the moment, and instead try and think about how I’d feel later. For example, would it taste great to eat a bunch of unhealthy food right now? Sure, but imagining how gross I’ll feel after the fact, keeps me stronger in the moment so I make the appropriate choice. The key is imagining the feelings you’d have later as opposed to the ones you’d have in the short term. If you’ll feel great about it later, then go for it. If not, make a different choice.
Something I saw and loved. I watched a football biography over the weekend and the coach talked about focusing on the process more so than the result. His feeling was that if the process is diligent and sound, the results will take care of themselves. The process involves a host of factors including planning, practice, repetition and more.
This appealed to me, and I have found this to be true athletically, personally and in business. We are all after a certain goal or result. Without a path to get there however, this is nothing more than a dream. A solid process gives our goal a road map to eventual success. It allows us to prioritize all the steps along the way and to pay attention to all the important details. As an example, I’ve been around many business owners throughout the years. Those that I speak to that talk to me about their processes they have within their businesses always make money as a by-product of them. The owners that I speak to that lack good processes never make the money they expect to.
A workout I use to challenge myself. Normally when I work out there’s some form of a finish line in sight. In other words, a certain number of repetitions on a set, miles on a run, etc. When this is the case, it makes it easier on your mind as it knows how far left it must go. To challenge my body and mind in a different way, I regularly do workouts I call “blind time.”
When I do these, I will pick some type of exercise such as hitting a heavy bag, squatting, sprinting, etc. and set a timer on my phone for a given amount of time (1 – 3 min usually) but not look at it. The timer will beep when it’s done but since I can’t see it, I have no idea how much time remains. This will play tricks on your mind as 1-3 minutes can feel like forever and your mind constantly tells you just to stop. These workouts have helped me strengthen my perseverance throughout the years as it has gotten me accustomed to hanging in there for just a bit longer. Done repeatedly, this can have profound effects!
Reminder of an important principle. My middle son plays on a tackle football team. The coach sends out emails constantly and talks at practice about how it’s never about the wins, it’s about the kids. Last Saturday however, they had a big win against a challenging opponent and the first thing the coach said afterwards was “I know a lot of you didn’t play much but, it was that type of game where we had to play the best players.” In other words, he did what he needed to win, even at the expense of some of the kids. I am a highly competitive person and coach myself, so I get it, but the disconnect between what he constantly preaches versus the actions he put forth really struck me.
It is extremely easy to talk or think of ourselves in a certain way, usually in the best light possible. However, people will judge us based on actions, not words. When we talk one way and act differently, we lose credibility. Conversely, when we act exactly as we say we will, people develop trust in us. There is a saying I love that fits this lesson perfectly, “don’t talk about it, be about it.”
Some quotes I love.
“Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.” – Thomas Edison
“Your own family will talk sh** about you when you’re in the process of breaking all their generational curses. This ain’t for the weak.”’ – Denzel Washington
“Victims make excuses. Leaders deliver results.” – Robin Sharma
“You always pass failure on the way to success.” – Mickey Rooney
“You can’t climb a smooth mountain.” – Zig Ziglar
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