On Fridays I like to share experiences I’ve had during the week with patients and in my personal life that I’ve found significant. I like to share them in hopes that you might find value in them and have something resonate with you in your life.
Something I believe. Last week, I had a young boy say “That looks easy” after I adjusted him and his family. His mom was slightly embarrassed and told him not to say that, but I told him I loved it. I explained to him that when you do something for a long time, have extensive training, and continue to improve your skills; what you do should look easy. For example, when you think of your first day of work or the first time you tried a new hobby compared to how you operate years later, it should look much easier. When I watch the Food Network, I feel as if I could be a great chef by adding citrus and a few pre-chopped ingredients to something because they make it look effortless. This is obviously not the case.
Personally, I love to deal with people that make things look easy because to me this is a sign of competence, confidence, and experience. Their level of skill puts me at ease, and I feel great using their services or taking their advice. If someone ever tells you that what you do looks easy, take it as a compliment because it takes experience to have it look that way!
A business principle that applies to life. There is a saying I love in business “If everyone is your market, then no one is your market.” The meaning behind this is that if you try to please everyone, you will end up offering products or services that appeal to very few. This has applications to daily life as well.
If you make it your goal to please everyone in your life, you are not likely to succeed. Instead, you will end up being less authentic, creating weaker relationships, and feeling conflicted with your own behavior. The simple fact is, not everyone will like you or how you operate. I can tell you that in my case, my energy, drive, and personality traits cause many to gravitate toward me and others to get away from me. In the end, we just must be our true selves and let things sort out how they may. As in business, do not be afraid to refine your market because it will keep you focused on the people and things that truly matter rather than those that don’t.
An important concept. Leadership is a topic that is discussed but rarely understood. Many believe leadership means being a domineering presence, the loudest voice, etc. While that can be the case, my belief is that leadership is simply about making those around you better in some manner. Therefore, great leaders are more prevalent than you may think.
Each role in our lives allows us a chance to display leadership without making ourselves the center of attention. In my case, being a husband, father, doctor, business owner, coach, Sunday school teacher, and volunteer with disabled children/adults all offer me opportunities to lead. Yours may be different but opportunities will always present themselves if you only take the time to look for them. The important thing is to give our best effort, be authentic, and adhere to our values and principles (which hopefully are sound). This will develop trust, and before long, will create a dynamic where people look to us for help and our positive influence. To me, that is what leadership is all about.
A question to always ask. “Is this sustainable?” This simple question is crucial yet often ignored. When something is sustainable, it will allow us to do it repeatedly without causing damage or negative consequences. If it is not sustainable, it will usually offer some form of temporary benefit now and negative impacts later.
This question should be at the top of all our minds. If things are sustainable, you have found a great approach. If not, then consider ways to alter your method so that you can begin gaining ground rather than losing it. Finances, relationships, exercise, nutrition, mental habits, and more all should be evaluated regularly for their sustainability.
Some quotes I love.
“Fear is a reaction. Courage is a decision.” – Winston Churchill
“Be prepared to work always without applause.” – Ernest Hemingway
“Simple words to live by. Be strong when you are weak. Be brave when you are scared. Be humble when you are victorious. Be badass every day.”
“Healing also means taking an honest look at the role you play in your own suffering.” – Brandi MacDonald