On Fridays I like to share experiences I’ve had during the week with patients and in my personal life that I’ve found significant. I like to share them in hopes that you might find value in them and have something resonate with you in your life.
Something that motivates me. Before I got married to my wife in 2017, we met several times with the pastor that married us. Among the great advice he shared, I remember him saying “Matt, with the wrong woman, a man will not accomplish much. However, when he has the right woman behind him to encourage him, he can accomplish anything.” I have found this to be true.
My wife makes a habit of telling me that she is proud of me. Sometimes it’s for how I volunteer my time, interact with my kids, handle a situation, or display certain principles. Other times, she just tells me that I’m a good man and she’s proud to be my wife. Regardless, those simple words motivate me more than I can express. When I am living in an exemplary fashion, my wife takes the time to encourage it. This makes me want to do even better for our family and in all aspects of my life.
A good reminder. I have been coaching my current football team since 2018 when most of my players were 7 or 8 years old. We have always been decent but took a lot of lumps along the way. Our greatest losses prompted our biggest changes and trust me, there were many. Slowly we have gelled over the last 2 seasons into a dominant team. Now that we are at this higher level, we are not well-liked, even though my players are all humble and play the game as it should be played.
The reason for this is simple. When you begin to achieve at a high level, no one ever understands or realizes what went into getting there. They were not there to see you feel humiliated, suffer losses, question yourself, or rebuild from the bottom. To them, you may just be lucky or acting unfairly. The road to success is paved in the dark and once it reaches the light, few will understand or respect what it took to get there. This will be true in sports as well as any other endeavor you can imagine. Do not let this upset you, use it instead as a reminder of how far you have come.
A recent interaction. There is someone that I had been helping for months for free because they were in a tough situation. I provided them with my best efforts and progress continued to be made. However, after a period I began to feel taken advantage of. I was doing my part, but they were not following up with the advice or guidance I was giving for them to follow outside of my care. As a result, I decided that I no longer wanted to work for free. Immediately, this caused this person to want to do more on their own to help themselves because they would now need to pay me (or someone like me) for treatments.
This brought up two lessons I believe in. First, you must want to participate in your own rescue if it is to be successful. In other words, if you care more about someone achieving a positive result than they do, it is destined to fail. They should want the goal even more than you want it for them. Furthermore, this situation can become like attempting to rescue a panicked swimmer from the ocean, they will drag you down with them if you’re not careful. When you are giving your time and effort to help someone, make sure it is being valued and respected. Otherwise, it will be of no benefit to either party.
Something that always helps me. We all go through tough times and slumps in life. This can occur in business, relationships, exercise, nutrition, hobbies, and more. When I find myself in situations like this, I find tremendous value in going back to basics. Returning to the most fundamental aspects of an endeavor quickly rebuilds me.
For example, if I find myself frustrated or overwhelmed running my chiropractic business, I pretend it’s 18 years ago and I am brand new in practice. This gets me even more excited to see my patients, explain what I’m doing, and take pride in their results. I focus on making sure the office looks even better, brainstorming ideas to make the business grow, and much more. The point is that I take my focus from what is bothering me and return it back to the essentials that have built me. Flipping that switch never fails me and always reminds me of how much I have to be grateful for. I use it in business, training, and so much more.
Some quotes I love.
“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.” – Maria Robinson
“I will not coax other men to join the mission. I will not beg my wife to partner in this life. I will not bribe my kids to grow wise. I will lead. The rest takes care of itself.” – Matt Beaudreau
“To whom much is given, much will be required.” – Luke 12:48