Dr. Kenney’s Friday 5 Spot
On Fridays I like to share experiences I’ve had during the week with patients and in my personal life that I’ve found significant. I share these in the hope that you might find value in them and have something that resonates with you in your life.
Something important. My cousin was killed tragically on Christmas when he was nineteen, my brother-in-law (and a best friend) died out of nowhere in 2020 at age 32, and my sister passed away suddenly without warning at age 43 in 2022. When I got these pieces of news, I threw up, I collapsed, and cried like a little kid. These people were important to me, I loved them, and they were gone decades before anyone would have expected. Since that time, I’ve been witness to nieces and nephews that lost parents at young ages, grieving spouses, and parents who lost children. I mention this because in the wake of the horrible tragedies last week, I saw some despicable reactions that reminded me of two points.
First, if you can justify harm coming to people for personal, political, or any other reasons; I feel sorry for you. You never want to sacrifice your humanity by rooting for someone’s demise for the sake of proving a point, highlighting your agenda, or any other reasons. It’s never worth it and it takes away a piece of your soul if you do. Second, when you’ve seen what death does to families, you could never root for it under any circumstances. I am no pacifist but still wouldn’t wish the grief I’ve seen within my family, my in-laws, etc. on my worst enemy. Human life is too precious to ever wish it away for anyone, regardless of what you may think of them.
Something that helps me. This week I was speaking to someone that was extremely stressed and anxious about issues they were facing and the potential aftermath of them. They asked me for my advice, and I said in similar situations, I utilize a three-part process to guide me. First, I identify what the absolute worst-case scenario is. Then, I find what my options would be if that occurs. Finally, once I have that defined, I map out what I can be done immediately so that hopefully, none of those things happen.
This approach may sound simplistic but that’s why I find it effective. These three steps are about drawing your focus and energy away from things you cannot control and bringing them back toward what you can. Honestly assessing what the worst case looks like and what you’d do if it were to transpire takes away much of the power and stress it carries. Furthermore, once you have a picture of where you don’t want to end up, you are more motivated and willing to do what you can immediately to start creating more favorable outcomes. As someone that used to get overwhelmed quite easily, I can attest that this process is constructive, productive, and always works quite well.
Something that chiropractic has taught me. As a chiropractor for almost twenty years, I have been blessed to receive some of the kindest and most heartfelt compliments you could imagine. However, I have also heard many derogatory, insulting, untrue, and unfounded things about my profession. So, what does this teach me? To quote from a Public Enemy song I like, “Don’t let a win go to your head or a loss to your heart.”
My goal as a chiropractor is to provide the best care possible for my patients while earning a good living for my family in the process. I take both of those missions seriously and sleep well knowing my actions are always integrous, honest, and professional. Therefore, I don’t need to chase the opinions of others. All I can do is my best and then let things fall where they may. When people compliment me, it makes me feel great, but I quickly move on. Likewise, when I hear negativity about my profession, I don’t let it affect me. Instead, I continue doing what has enabled me to help tens of thousands of people over the years. Being a chiropractor has taught me to have thicker skin, protect my confidence, and to continue doing my best work regardless of what anyone else may say or think.
Something I believe. We have all heard the phrase, “slow and steady wins the race.” As someone that has been involved in hundreds of races in my lifetime from sprints to 100-mile runs, I would disagree. In fact, I and am yet to see a single race won by going “slow and steady.” What I find most effective in any race is maintaining the best pace possible, and then being bold, turning it on, and really going for it when the moment calls for it. These lessons are all applicable to life as well.
Consistency in any endeavor is important and will keep you in the game. You’ll make amazing strides simply by showing up each day, working hard, and doing solid work. However, when it comes to attaining the biggest goals you have personally, financially, etc., it will require more. These are the situations in which you will need to take a risk and exert yourself far more than is comfortable. Just as in a race, this can propel you to glory or cause you to crash and burn, but you’ll only know once you try. Remember, “slow and steady” will keep you competitive but if you want to win the tough ones, you’ll have to show guts and take big swings.
Some quotes I Love.
“Men don’t follow titles, they follow courage.” – William Wallace, Braveheart
“The trouble is that once you see it, you can’t unsee it. And once you’ve seen it, keeping quiet, saying nothing, becomes as political an act as speaking out. There’s no innocence. Either way, you’re accountable.” – Arundhati Roy
“If your peace depends on everything going right, it’s not peace, it’s control. To be steady in uncertainty, that’s real growth.”